POF Profile 2 - Quiz

HA! I can't believe how many people say, "I like music, films, dancing with my friends. Anyway, that's enough because I don't want you to know everything about me before we even meet!"


WOAH, what?! The two main forms of entertainment and dancing and we've nearly covered everything that you're about? Holy sh!t, that is depressing.


But I've begun to notice that there are three types of people in the world today. The Simpletons, The Pretentious Try Hards, and The Nutters. Which are you?


It's Friday night. What would you like to do, and what do you end up doing?


a) I'd like to do a hot girl with big tits, but I end up doing a girl that looks like she kissed a moving freight train... with thunder thighs. Her thighs.. not the trains.

b) I'd like to listen to some good music with my friends, watch four movies, eat loads of food and post the pictures on Facebook. I end up doing that.

c) I'd like to kill myself. I end up watching TV in my pants and eating peanut butter on garlic bread.


Okay. A hot girl walks past. What do you do?


a) Slam jam her f*ck hole, if she'll let me.

b) Hey, I'm not that kind of guy! There are still good guys out there, you know. I'd just walk by and if she wants to chat, she'll chat to me.

c) What? I was thinking about McDonalds apple pies... so everyone just looks like an apple pie.


I'm hungry. GET ME SOME FOOD RIGHT NOW! Please...?


a) EH, fu' dat mayte, u carn't boss me round li' and jus' tell me wot to do n sh!t. I went to college fur a hole week, u no.

b) OH YES, what can I get you? I'm really great at cooking, so just let me know what you'd like and I'll make it for you :)

c) I keep burgers in my pants. *Pulls out a double cheeseburger from pants* You're welcome to it.


I tell you that you're super annoying and I'm done hanging around with you.... What do you say?


a) PFFFT, I'm late to **** someone anyway. Girls love back acne... it's the new thing. I've never been so popular.

b) I don't understand...? I'm not upset, I'm just confused... We could have had something really good here... Just stay and talk to me, please...

c) Nothing. You've put me in your kangaroo pouch and now we're bouncing through town whilst you stroke my hair. You know I can't resist that.


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If you got mostly A's... then you're a SIMPLETON! Congratulations, you're a cretin and you never even realised. Everything about you is basic, you have trouble tying your own shoelaces and eventually you'll screw a fat girl and lock your self into 20 years of bring up a scrawny little scrote of a child that spits in your face and hits. Yes... that's right... your child is a hitter.


If you got mostly B's... then you're a PRETENTIOUS TRY HARD! Actually, you're way more annoying than anyone else in the entire universe. You think you're so goddamn different to everyone else. Your love of alternative music, perhaps, or the fact that you can cook makes you think you're gods gift to women. You're so kind, so thoughtful and all your friends think you're funny, too! You outwardly project an exciting and interesting life, that in reality is even more boring than the old school films you insist on watching in an attempt to make people think that you're artistic and all that bullsh!t. You really are a useless quim and I hate you with every fiber of my being. Don't talk to me.


If you got mostly C's... then you're a NUTTER! Yeah, you're bonkers. But, it's okay. I'll have you for a week, two weeks maximum. Sometimes simpletons and pretentious try hards mistakenly think that they are in the nutter category... but if this happens, I'll just ignore you. If you double message, I'll start hurling insults and if you're ugly too then I'll take a crap through your letter box.